His Old Skin

Though what's inside makes me want more of him, his outside is what surprises me.
Especially at my age, overlooking warts, wrinkles, and infirmities is common when making dating choices. I’ve dated some really ugly people, and I’ve dated the handsomest man around. I am not shallow and insist on handsome, but I don’t look for the ugly, either. It all depends on the person inside.
That’s why adoring his old skin surprised me.
When I first saw his picture, sent online, it took my breath away. I liked how he looked. In person, he is just as handsome.
But when people get past a certain age, the processes that keep the skin moisturized and smooth diminish, making older skin appear crepe-y and wrinkled. Young people have no idea how really beautiful they are. Having smooth skin is an under-appreciated attribute amongst youth. .
Anyway, the men I date are of that certain age, and so am I. I don’t like wrinkles and thin skin, but it’s inevitable to a certain extent, so I accept it gracefully.
Finding it attractive on a lover isn’t something to be desired. It’s like desiring bad eyesight. So I knew my feelings towards him were truly special when I even liked his old skin.
I think about him, fantasize about him; he appears in my mind exactly as he is, mature, slightly bald, and with aging skin. I find it all very, very attractive.
I’d love to be kissing that handsome, aging skin. It affects me like a six-pack stomach excites a teenager.
If only he felt the same way.
Which confounds me, because I thought chemistry was supposed to work both ways. Chemistry strong enough to make me write about old skin should be felt by both!
It's amazing to me that this feeling can be so one-sided.
But I guess it is, so I'd thought I'd commemorate loving his old skin by at least writing about it, if I can't really act on it.
It's the mature thing to do.