Don't Expect Me to Do Oil Changes too

I’ve finally given in and put totally non-feminine gifts on my wish list.
In years past, when generous relatives have asked for gift ideas, I’ve mentioned perfumes, body lotions, creams, and fuzzy slippers as items I’d love to receive.
This year, it’s a stepladder and gift card to Lowes, the home improvement store.
I’ve accepted that no one is coming soon to be my toolbench prince.
I was hoping that the man in my life would also bring a dowry, if you will, of ladders, tools and a cordless drill. I’ve been patiently waiting for the man with a stepladder to sweep me off my feet,
The flaw in my thinking is that first I must hook up with that man. That has proven futile. I realize I need to take care of things myself.
I must stop thinking that a princely man is going to save me from wobbly lightbulb changing duties, top-shelf pullout surprises, and painting high walls. I’ve accepted my fate.
I will soon be a woman with a useful, sturdy stepladder. And then, I’ll buy a cordless drill.
I’ll only need a man for love, affection and some companionship.
I’ll be a much less needy woman. And we all know that the less needy a woman is the more threatened most men become.
"What? She has her own stepladder?! Feminazi alert!"
So I think I’m doomed. I’m sealing my fate. I’m a non-needy woman who takes care of herself in all ways now.
No, wait, a man with a truck would be very useful. Getting my lawnmower to the shop for maintenance and repairs is next to impossible in my Mustang’s trunk. Yes! I’m still needy!
That’s a good sign, isn’t it?